With more people moving away from the towns where they were raised, and more retirees choosing to spend their golden years in locales with warmer climates or lower costs of living, today's families tend to be farther apart than ever before. So when distant parents begin to show signs that they are no longer able to care for them selves or adequately handle the responsibilities of day-to-day living, ensuring their continued well-being can pose significant challenges for their adult children. If you are facing this growing problem, the following information will help you better understand the situation and take appropriate action.
How far is too far? Parents don't need to be hundreds of miles away to be out of reach. If they live far enough away that you can't easily get to them on at least a weekly basis they might as well be in another country.
A lot depends on how well your loved ones are still able to care for themselves. If they are relatively independent and socially active, a weekly phone call and the occasional visit may be sufficient to relive any concerns you may have. However, if they live alone and have medical issues, the picture changes dramatically. Suddenly you need to be prepared for anything.
By making a checklist like the one on the following page, you'll get a much better idea of the steps to take and kinds of assistance you may need to look for.
Do your parents currently need skilled medical help?
Do they need help with daily personal care?
Do they need transportation to doctors and other appointments?
Do they need home modifications, such as wheelchair ramps or grab bars?
Do they need help with household chores such as cooking, shopping, and cleaning?
Do they need legal assistance or help with money matters?
Do they need opportunities to socialize with others?
Preparing for Emergencies
Even if your parent is in good health, in the event of an emergency, you should be prepared to react fast and deal with any outcome. Taking some simple steps now can prevent a lot of headaches later.
- Long Distance
short-term rehab/ sub-acute
long-term care
respite
hospice
Are medications being properly taken?
Are your parents eating properly?
Are their finances in order?
Is the home being maintained?
Are they taking care of their appearance?
Is driving becoming a problem?
Is mobility decreasing?
Are they becoming a danger to themselves?
Are they becoming reclusive?
Have there been frequent trips to the hospital?
Keep copies of your loved one's medical records, incluing names of primary doctors and medications
Power of Attorney*
Living Will*
Advance Medical Directives*
Have enough money put aside for emergency plane fare
*for more information on these important documents, order our complimentary pamphlet, "Living Wills and Advance Directives, Making the Choices that are Right for You."
